Cool Wednesday...

It is a Wednesday morning, cool and nice in the outside and chilly in the indoors due to powerful air-condition. Nothing is compared to the warm sensation that I have experienced as the picture on the left depicts; warm fantasis with a tweet of coldness. The hardness of his physique soothes my nervous nerves and calms my soul.

My sexual orientation, I am most concern about. I have not had sex for almost three years. Maybe I have decided to keep my body for the one and only one. Though human, I have been fighting hard to control my physical desires. I have yet to find my true love, I hope I will be able to meet my him this years, prayers... What worries me is that I am also attracted to women though it is getting lesser all these years for only those in high profile are worthy of my emotions.

Gothic Love

I know I am always bitten by the love bug, filled with love lore and fantasis of my beloved ones. They come and go but I have learnt to let it go, painlessly. Gone are the days where I was deeply hurt with grief through rejection. They are still around but it is I who is controlling the situation, I try not immerse myself deep into the abyss of hopelessness, helpless with no possibility of return.

I can't help but fall in love, the cycle doesn't end, it goes on and on. Years passed on, I am still the emotional freak though things are much better these days. I have learnt to cope with my uncontrollable infatuations and they are mostly females. Sex is now secondary to me, till I find my true love I will put it on hold, for the time being...

A Chinese Ghost Story

I went to watch the movie The Chinese Ghost Story on 22 April 2011 at the Cineleisure Orchard and was moved to tears at the ending part. 24 Years ago, I watched the first version in 1987, then I was only 13 years old barely reaching puberty. 24 years later the longing for love still remain fresh etched deeply in me and was revealed this day.

Love, I have yet to immerse myself throughly with the opposite sex

Three years, and it is still going .....

It has been three years since I last updated my blog. During these past three years my life, filled with love (I am a bisexual) lorn and tramatised issues I would say. I am still with where I am and it is the fifth year now, how I have accomplished as I thought to myself proudly. I am 37 now, the thought of reaching 40 years of age shudders me. I have yet to find my true love with the opposite sex and I must confess it sometimes saddens me, I am not ugly but just blinded on the right eye.


Today is Good Friday, a public holiday in Singapore. Life goes on...

Under her care - DR BRENDA LOW WEN YONG

I went back to work on the 13 November 2008. Seen Dr Brenda Low on the 11 November 2008 and she gave me the green light. The feeling is simply GREAT GREAT GREAT to be back to work in the office, work is moderate but I know more will be coming in time to come. The feeling was so immerse that I wrote a joyful email to Dr Low expressing the happiness and to my greatest unexpectation she replied the next day which made my day tremendously... the greatest joy was when I reached home on Friday evening after work I received the medical report from her clinic, she has indicated that I shall be under her purview and care every now and then, which means I will get to see her in regular interval (for pap smear i suppose). My next visit will be end of November 2008 Saturday and to my delight I will be her last patient of the day in her clinic, which means if I am smart enough, more memorable and quality time to be spent with her on that day!!! I pray hard.

One worry fact is that my right abdominal pain persist even after Dr Low has removed the cysts. I am now depending on ponstan (painkiller) to stem the pain. Sometimes during the night the pain gets so bad that I curl up in a foetus position in order to sleep. No one knows what is wrong, and I will endure the pain in order to be able to ...

DR BRENDA LOW WEN YONG

I have been resting at home since my cystectomy operation in early November 2008. It is taking the toil on me, mentally. The wound has almost healed by now, I guess. However the right abdominal pain still persists, what am I going to do.. panic-stricken I am determined to confide the pain to Dr Brenda Low on my visit to her tomorrow at her Gleneagles Medical Centre #03-01. Dr Brenda Low.... ahhhhhh what am I going to do???!!??!?!? I guess I will write her an email once a month, to update her my life going-on and hopefully she will reply and... dare not think too far.

I can still remember that November 08 afternoon where I was lying on the OT table of Thomson Medical Centre. The anaesthetist was not able to locate a vein from my left arm and it was Dr Low who manage to locate iton my right arm.... I really don't know what is wrong with me, it is almost a week after the surgery and I am still experiencing pain on my right abdominal pelvis, SIGH!

ROAD TO RECOVERY

The operation/surgery is a success and I woke up from the General Anaesthesia. I am resting at home now, all thanks to Dr Brenda Low. Dr Low.... ahhh how I adore her but loss of expressing my feelings. She is no ordinary woman and I have been telling myself to tread carefully lest of 'chasing' her away. I am wondering that after my full recovery I wouldn't have the chance to see her again that often. Of course there is always the email but that will depend whether she wants to reply to my mails or not. Once I have recovered I will run full speed in pursing my career in the public sector. May God help me....